Dear Annie: I am writing about an issue that I believe is affecting many couples now. The issue is pornography.

My husband and I have been married for 25 years, and we had a happy marriage while raising our three children. They all turned out to be good, responsible adults. We bought a house together, went on vacations and really lived a pretty good life over the years.

However, things seemed to change two years ago. Suddenly, I find myself yearning for his attention and compliments. I know I’m not as young as when he met me, but I stay in relatively good shape and spend time taking care of myself. My problem is that I believe he is addicted to pornography.

Before Christmas, he decided that he needed a 75-inch flat-screen TV. I could not understand why, but he went ahead and had it installed while I was at work. I also noticed that he gets very anxious when I’m home on a day off and he doesn’t have the television and living room to himself. I recently went through the cable bill (which is one he pays) and found that he is paying several hundred dollars a month on pornography channels.

I feel that he has become so taken by his addiction that he is not satisfied with how any woman looks if they don’t look like the girls he watches on the screen. Our sex life has become nonexistent. I’ve tried talking to him about this, but he quickly shuts off the conversation by saying, “Everyone watches porn, what’s the big deal”?

To me, it has become a very big deal and a big addiction. Any advice? -- Left for the Television in New York

Dear Left for the Television: You are not alone. There are many spouses who find themselves in similar situations. While it might seem like you are left for the television or pornography, what you are really left for is a sick man who is in the middle of an addiction.

There are many support groups online and in person. Please encourage your husband to seek help. If he is completely in denial, then it is time to seek the help of a professional counselor -- for you, so you can decide what to do. You might also seek couples therapy.

Dear Annie: I love my boyfriend, but I am Catholic and he is Jewish. We have been dating for four years. My biological clock is ticking, as I am turning 29 next month. My boyfriend is not very religious, but I am a devout Catholic. I go to Mass every Sunday and observe all the religious Holy Days of Obligation.

My boyfriend said he will not convert to Catholicism but is OK with having the kids be raised Catholic. Do you think the marriage will work? I am torn, but at this point, I cannot start over and date someone new. Please help. -- Feeling Torn

Dear Torn: Love conquers all -- and that certainly includes different religions. It sounds like your boyfriend is being very reasonable with you, especially saying the kids will be raised Catholic. Marriages of different religions work all the time, and there are plenty of divorces in marriages of the same religion. The most important pillars of a relationship are honest and open communication, along with a mutual respect for your partner’s differences and similarities.

You didn’t say, but I wonder if the real reason you are feeling torn might be that you are still waiting for a proposal after four years. Regardless, you should see yourself as very young at 29, which you are. You have a whole lifetime of happiness ahead of you, whether it is with your boyfriend or someone else. Good luck!

Dear Annie: I would also like to weigh in on the conversation about dumping cats. We live out in the country and have had numerous cats dropped out here. Despite people soothing their conscience by telling themselves that the cat can “fend for itself,” the truth is that they can’t. This is something that must be learned from the parent; it is not a natural instinct. If the mother cat didn’t teach them to hunt, kill, seek shelter and avoid predators, they will not survive in the wild.

I have fixed abandoned cats at my own expense, given them shelter and fed them, as I will not let an animal starve. I think I speak for most country dwellers when I say we are all tired of you dumping your poor unwanted animals out here to die, or for us to take care of. Lots of communities do have spay and neuter programs, and there are rescues out there as well. I hope people will explore all possibilities instead of abandoning their defenseless pets. -- Country Dweller

Dear Country Dweller: Thank you for your letter. I hope it encourages others to spay and neuter their cats.

“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology -- featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation -- is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit http://www. creatorspublishing.com for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.