Dear Annie

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Dear Annie

Tue, 04/04/2023 - 14:19
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Dear Annie: I very much enjoyed your recent column called “Doctor Who Knows” regarding parents’ cellphone use. I’m a mom to a merry band of beautiful young children. One of those children has Type 1 Diabetes in addition to other health-related problems that impact the care of his Type 1. We are privileged to live in a time where I can monitor his blood glucose 24/7 via a cellphone app, and keep track of active insulin in his system via another cellphone app.

With all his health conditions, outings out of the house can be a bit of a “box of chocolates” in that I’m never quite sure that day whether adrenaline is going to run his blood sugar higher or spontaneous activity will make him crash. Therefore, I’m vigilant about checking these apps every 10-15 minutes when we’re out and about to see how he’s trending and to keep ahead of any potential crises.

I take a few quick glances and get back to the activity at hand, but to an outsider, this might appear as though I’m obsessively checking my phone and disconnecting from my kids. On the contrary, I’m checking my phone in order to keep us all happy and healthy. And if my child is not with me? I check my phone just as often in order to give caregivers advice.

By the way, this system only works because we’ve needed to get him a cellphone, too. Glucose readings go from his cellphone app into mine. Because he’s so young, we’ve disabled most things on his cellphone besides necessary health apps and calling/texting. But it brings up another key point: I admit that I used to be one of those judgmental people when it came to seeing young children carrying around cellphones of their own. But his diagnosis changed me, and now I realize that I cannot judge if I don’t have all the facts at hand.

Do I love living life connected to devices? No, not at all. But at the same time, they’re literal lifelines for us, so we take them for what they’re worth and limit our technology as much as we can within the confines of what we’re able to do.

Thanks, Annie! -- A “Connected” Mom

Dear Connected Mom: Thank you for your letter. You bring up such an important point, and I hope it brings awareness to others to not be so quick to judge if a mother or father is constantly checking their phone. The most important person who you are trying to model good behavior for is your children, and they know the difference between scrolling endlessly on your phone and using your phone for important medical information. Things are rarely black and white, and you just showed how technology has lots of shades of gray.

Dear Annie: I want to thank you and “Comfort for Grief” for sharing her father’s words about death. I am a new widow of one month, and those wonderful words went straight to my heart. My sweet husband was my best friend for 42 years. Now we are all learning to get through each day without him. Her letter helped. Grieving in Kentucky Dear Grieving: I am so sorry for your loss. So glad that the letter helped you.